Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!  This is a very special season for us since it is our first as a family of 3.  We hope you all have a blessed holiday season!
Much Love,
S&Z&C

We're moved....sort of....

Well it's been 2 1/2 weeks since we've moved and I wish I could say it's been all smiles and roses, but to be honest with you it hasn't.  It's been a little harder than I thought.  I've struggled with my patience (I know that's not a surprise to some of you ;)) and I'm not gonna lie, up until today I was somewhat questioning this decision we had made.  Maybe it wasn't the right thing to do.  I mean I have had a much harder time finding a job than I thought, our house in Troy hasn't sold, was this God's way to tell us that we had made a mistake??  But today while I was in Findlay running errands I felt God's reassurance, that this is where we are supposed to be.  I know that He will provide for us exactly what we need.  He has blessed us abundantly, and to that we give Him thanks and praise.  
I've also struggled a lot with exactly what we are supposed to do next as far as establishing ourselves again.  Zach and I have decided that we want to be smarter in buying our second home than we were when buying our first and so we feel the best way to do that is to live with our parents for a few more months.  Hopefully by spring our house in Troy will be sold and we will have saved up a decent amount of money for a house in Findlay.  More than anything I want a place to call our own, but I know the short term sacrifice will pay off in the long term.  We believe in Dave Ramsey's principles and want to be debt free ASAP, so that's what we are working towards.  I know I will struggle with this over the next few months so if you know me, please remind me of the long term benefits this will have in our life.
Anyhow on to the good stuff.  Yesterday I received and accepted a job offer that starts on January 2, so things are moving in the right direction.  Zach is happy with his job and definitely has his work cut out for him, but I know he likes a challenge every once in awhile. 
 Overall I would say it feels so good for us to be back.  It's nice to run into old friends and see lots of familiar faces.  It feels just like home which is exactly what we were hoping for when we decided to move. 

That's all for now. 
Much Love,
S&Z&C

.....and we're moving!

Well I am thrilled to announce that we are moving back to Northwest Ohio!  Zach got a job in Findlay, so we will go.  We have always said a lot of things would have to fall into place to make a move happen, and so far only 1 thing has, but we feel certain this is where God wants us to be.

The big  things that haven't worked out yet are me finding a job and our house selling.  I took a leap of faith 4 weeks ago and turned in my resignation at my current job.  I was and still am confident that God will provide exactly what we need, however with only 1 week of work left, I have no job!  So I wish I could say that I am cool as a cucumber, but I would be lying.  I'm more than a little nervous about the possibility of being unemployed and feel a little irresponsible for the decision I've made.  This is not a decision that the responsible, have all my ducks in a row type of woman that I am would have made, but it is a decision made by a woman of faith...a woman who trusts in the Lord.  Now most of you know that Zach and I have been through some pretty tough things in the past couple of years, but in the end, it always works out....God always provides!  So why wouldn't He provide now?!?  He has created a large amount of faith in both of us with all the struggles he has put in our lives and now is my chance to put it back to use.  (But please God, human Sarah is hoping things will fall into place sooner rather than later, otherwise she may develop an ulcer from all of this stress and worry.)

Oh yeah and about the whole house thing, which seems to be the least of our worries at this point.  We plan on moving in with our parents in the interim.  More details will be ironed out when I get a job and hopefully that will get the ball rolling on all of this craziness we call life.

Prayers for a plan to be revealed and our faithfulness to be rewarded are greatly appreciated. I promise I'll keep you updated.
Much Love,
S&Z&C

Contemplating a Move

For quite some time now Zach and I have contemplated a move that would take us closer to our families and for as long as we've wanted to move, we've felt for one reason or another the timing wasn't right.  Now that our adoption is finalized we feel like the time may finally be right.  We have taken some steps (such as putting our house on the market and starting the job search) and we are praying that God give us a sign, that He make this work if this is what is supposed to happen.  Of course now that we've decided this is a possibility in our lives, I want it to happen yesterday.  It's crazy to think that last year at this time, God was using adoption to teach us patience and here we are (or should I say here I am, because Zach is pretty patient) and God is using another life changing situation to try again to teach me patience!   We continue to tell ourselves that God's plan will be revealed in His time and I get a reminded of that each and every time I look at our precious son!

Tomorrow is a Good Anniversary

Tomorrow, Sept. 19, will mark the one year anniversary of us meeting K.  What a great anniversary that is!  I still remember how cautious we were going to meet her.  We were so damaged and broken from our failed adoption that occurred just eight days before this meeting.  We loved K the moment we met her, but we decided after our meeting that we weren't ready to take this risk again.  Thankfully, we didn't trust ourselves, we trusted God!  Within 24 hours of our meeting, we got a call from K's social worker letting us know she had chosen our family.  God certainly did have something amazing in store for us. 
I'm sure this isn't the first time I've said this, and I'm sure on this journey there will be many more learning opportunities, but it's amazing the things God uses to strengthen us!  The next time you're going thru any sort of suffering just remember this.....trust God, embrace suffering, and enjoy life!  What if we really embraced suffering?  I think most of us know after we've been hurt or gone thru a rough spot that there will be something positive on the other side, but what if we really embraced suffering.  How would that feel?  To be honest with you I can't say I know for sure, but I have a sneaky suspicion it would change my perspective on those tough times.  I think I'll strive to embrace suffering and see what happens!
Much Love,
S&Z(&C) 

Time to Celebrate!!

Today when I came home from work, I found the most excellent of surprises waiting for me in the mailbox.  It was in an envelope from our attorney, so I quickly opened it, curious what it may be.  When I opened the envelope I found a letter stating that the court had made an error in our finalization date and that our adoption was actually finalized on August 31st!!  My emotions were crazy out of control, and I almost fell to my knees so thankful for the way God's plan has unfolded in our lives.  Last year at this time we were wrapped up in some crazy drama, about to meet a little girl who we thought we would bring home on 9/12/10.  On 9/11/10 those plans fell apart and we had to pick ourselves up and jump back in the game.  We had no idea the difference a year would make, but I'm so eternally grateful we stuck it out to see!
Much love from the "3" Nyczs...
S & Z & C :)

Less than 3 weeks until finalization!

Sept. 21 seemed so far away in March....hard to believe in less than 3 weeks our adoption should be finalized.  We've had our final post placement visit and our social worker was going to submit her final assessment to the court this past Monday.  Since we've already gone thru the interlocutory hearing we do not have to return to court again.  We have been told by our social worker that on the 21st a final decree of adoption will be signed by the judge and we should receive our copy in the mail within a few days.  Basically, once our adoption is finalized there's no turning back.  At finalization Caleb will legally become a Nycz and will be issued a new birth certificate with Zach and I as his parents.  If we were changing his birth name, that would be legally official at finalization too, but since we and K decided on his first and middle names together, he will remain Caleb Matthew Joseph.

While we feel like Caleb is already ours, I'm sure we will be relieved to know he's 100% ours!  I don't feel like I'm carrying around any extra stress, but in some ways I'm sure a weight will be lifted off my shoulders when we get that final decree of adoption in the mail.  I think it may call for a celebration....I actually just like to have a reason to throw a party!

One week from today our should be baby girl will be 1 year old!  I continue to struggle with emotions about this anniversary.  I'm looking forward to spending next weekend away from home, with good company, enjoying our son, but I know my heart will remind me of the emotions we were feeling last year.  In some ways I feel like my heart will never be healed from the loss we experienced and maybe that's not a bad thing.  The experience we had has taught me to be slower to judge, quicker to love, and to live by faith.  Zach and I knew last year we were putting all of us on the line, but we also knew it was what we had to do.  We knew God had a plan....and that He did!  He taught us invaluable lessons thru some crazy heartbreak, but each heartbreak shapes and molds who we have become.  And right now, we're Caleb's parents who will teach him to be slow to judge, quick to love, and to live by faith because that's what the best teacher had taught us!!
Much Love,
S, Z, & C

A year ago...

It's hard to believe how much our lives have changed over the past year.  God has blessed us immensely with Caleb and his birthmom, and we are so grateful for that, but as September draws nearer I can't help but remember that baby girl that was almost ours.  I think about her and S every single day.  I pray that they are safe and that S has somehow turned her life around.  I find myself wanting to text her to appease my worries, but on the other hand I'm not sure I want to open that can of worms again.  She put us through more stress and heartache than I ever thought possible, but I honestly do believe that I have forgiven her wholeheartedly.  Please pray for S and her children, as I've said before she needs to know the love of Jesus!  Zach and I appreciate your prayers as well as Sept. 9 grows closer, we know we'll need them!  I have a feeling that's going to be a difficult day.
Much Love,

S&Z (&C)

6 Months Old!

Last Sunday, Caleb was 6 months old!  I know it's so hard to believe.  We got his pictures taken on Sunday and I thought I'd share a few.  He was so good, just so happy and smiley the entire time.

We have a little under 2 months until our finalization hearing.   We are definitely excited about that.  Other than that, everything is going well.  We don't hear too much from K, but I keep in contact with her grandma on a regular basis thru email.  This is what we have been told to expect from birthmoms, but we are honestly extremely surprised how quickly it's seemed to happen with our adoption.  We'll see what the future holds, only time will tell.
Much Love,
S&Z(&C)

Summertime!

After almost 2 months I thought it was about time for an update.  Everything with our adoption is heading in the right direction.  We continue to have our monthly post placement visits with our social worker which will continue until finalization which is scheduled for Sept. 21. 
Caleb continues to be an AWESOME blessing!  We are constantly in awe of him.  He's growing so quickly just like everyone says.  He's sitting, rolling, and is eating anything and everything we give him.  It's looking like we are going to have a crawler before long!  Last time at the pediatrician he weighed just over 18 lbs. and was 26 1/2 inches long...he's finally getting taller!  He is the happiest baby and just so easy going.  We know we probably won't be so lucky with our next child! 
For now we are enjoying our summer, looking forward to our camping trip as well as our long weekend at Crooked Lake. 
Much Love....S&Z(&C)

What's New??

^{Well it's been a couple of weeks and there have been a few events in our lives since I last wrote.  First of all, we had Caleb baptized on Mother's Day.  It was a wonderful day filled with family.  K came with her grandma and brother, and I got to share my very first Mother's Day with the woman who made it possible for me to be a mommy.  And despite of everyone else's worries, it was amazing!!}  

^{I also got Caleb's 3 month pictures on Tuesday and since Cargle Photography gives me the copyright to them, I'm going to share a few of them with you!!}

^{I will leave you with this verse....I came across it this morning in my transformation journal.  It helped me many times during our journey and it can come in handy when you are just having a bad day.  It reminds me that regardless of how hard it is to go through our suffering it doesn't compare to the suffering Jesus endured for our sin and that God has a reason for it and in the end it will make you more like Christ!!} 

^{Romans 5:1-5}

^{Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.  And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.  Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.}

^{Much Love,}

^S&Z

Strong Enough

I heard a new song on K-LOVE today and it really struck a chord with me.  I just had to come home and download it.  "Strong Enough" is the name of the song by Matthew West.  I encourage you to check it out.  It brings to mind all of the people who have said to Zach and I that they don't think they could go thru what we've been thru on our adoption journey.  To those people we generally say we didn't think we could either, but by the grace of God we did.  If you are feeling called to adoption, but are fearful because of the risks involved, please realize that you will not face this alone.  God will be with you every step of the way.  The cheesy little saying that reoccurs in my head is "If God brings you to it, He'll bring you thru it" and that is so very true.  Zach and I have emerged from this journey as a family of three, who know God more intimately than when we did before.
This is going to be a crazy week for us, hopefully our little trooper will stand strong and remain happy.  Tomorrow we have my Grandpa's viewing and funeral which is always emotionally exhausting.  Sunday Caleb gets baptized and we are having a party afterwards.  Parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, as well as K and her grandma all plan to attend.  We are looking forward to having our little guy baptized.  I just pray that the stress doesn't get the best of me.  I have a tendency to try to make everything just perfect...it never works, but for some reason I don't remember that when it's happening.
No pictures with this post, but I hope to have Caleb's 3 month pictures soon!

Blessings!!
S&Z

On my heart.....

A few weeks ago we went to speak at an adoptive parenting class Zach and I took last spring.  It's a wonderful class and we were so excited to share our story.   Time totally got away from us, and we didn't get to share everything that we wanted, but it was an awesome experience and I was so excited to see so many couples excited about adoption.  It truly has been an amazing experience for us.  Don't get me wrong, it was by no means easy, but our faith has been tested and grown tremendously over the past year and a half.  When we spoke a member of the class asked us if we would do this all again, knowing what we know now.  Zach and I both said yes.  We knew there were risks, we felt as prepared as possible when we decided to adopt, and we feel like our agency did their very best to make our first adoption plan a success.  In the end it didn't work out and that is no one's fault.  I don't blame the agency and I don't even blame S. 
I think our story may have scared some people and that wasn't at all our intention.  We just wanted people to know the risks and God forbid if what happened to us happens to them, they can think back to us our story, draw strength, and know that they too will survive. I've said it before and I'll say it again....God's timing is perfect.   If He has laid adoption on your heart, He will not let you down. 

We continue to enjoy parenthood.  Caleb is starting to laugh and it is absolutely adorable.  He just melts my heart.  We are so very grateful for K and her decision, she has changed our lives forever!!

Until next time.....
Much love!
S&Z

Good News!

We got big news yesterday that takes some weight and anxiety off our shoulders with the legalities of our adoption.  There were no birthfathers registered on the Ohio Putative Father Registry in regards to our adoption!  And come Monday look forward to feeling even more confident with how things are going.  We go to court on the 21st for an interlocutory hearing, basically an extra step recommended by our attorney for added security.  Looks like Caleb is going to be stuck with us ;)

This past weekend we met with K, her grandma, and her brother.  It was the first time we had seen her since that bittersweet day when we left the hospital.  She was so surprised to see how much Caleb has grown.  She was a little emotional, but I think overall it was a happy day for everyone involved.  Zach and I are very comfortable with our adoption plan in this situation.  The relationship we have developed with K over the past 6 months is just so natural and normal.  God really knew what He was doing when He brought us together!

Zach and I have both returned to work this week, which means Caleb has spent 3 days at the babysitter's.  So far it's been ok, no major issues and he seems to be adjusting well.  I think it's more of an adjustment for mommy and daddy as we have so much to get done when we get home from work.  I'm sure it will just take some time to develop a routine. 

Our other exciting news, or should I say my other exciting news is that we have been invited to tell our story to a class of potential adoptive parents at a local hospital.  We took the class last spring and loved it so much.  During our failed adoption we clung to the words that those adoptive couples spoke.  It gave us hope that God would provide, and to pick ourselves up and jump back in that rollercoaster car.  I look forward to meeting families who are just beginning their journey and hopefully our story will help them at some point along this sometimes long and windy road.  

Here's a couple of recent pics....

That's about all for now....
Much Love,
S&Z

Returning to Work

Well Caleb is 6 weeks old and I will be returning to work on tomorrow.  I have mixed feelings about going back to work.  I have enjoyed my time off and am so grateful I had 6 weeks to bond with Caleb.  The thought of leaving him for a whole day brings me to tears.  We have had our fair share of difficulties in these first 6 weeks and I will not go so far to say that I enjoyed every minute of my leave.  There were days when being stuck at home due to the ice and snow made me absolutely crazy.  There were also days when his crying and fits really pushed my buttons.  But in the end, I still absolutely adore and love him with every ounce of me.  He's a precious gift that we continue to be grateful for every single day and he definitely has a way of melting my heart.

Here's what I have discovered in the last 6 weeks:
1:) My husband is AMAZING!!
2:) I dislike being woken up in the middle of the night :(
3:) Children are God's greatest gifts
4:) I need to socialize with adults on a regular basis
5:) We have an awesome family
6:) We are amazingly blessed!!

Thank you again for all of the prayers, love and support we have received.  We look forward to making memories with our new little man, knowing many of you will be a part of them. 
Much love and many blessings!
S&Z

Since We've Been Home...

It's been a little over 2 weeks since we brought Caleb home from the hospital and although we are sleep deprived, we have all survived.  I am off work until March 1st and Caleb is quickly becoming a momma's boy after spending the past couple of weeks with me.   I love the time that I get to spend with him during the day, he's just so sweet.  We've had our share of rough days and nights, but I have to remind myself how blessed we are to have him in our lives.  He melts my heart every time he looks at me.  I'm still blown away that he's ours.  Here's a few more pictures.  I can't believe how much he's changed in the past 2 weeks.

Introducing Our Handsome Son....

CALEB MATTHEW JOSEPH was born on 1/17/11, brought home yesterday and was officially ours today at about 3 PM.  We are emotionally overwhelmed right now, so grateful for God's blessings.  When we got the call I looked at Zach with tears in my eyes, so thankful that we decided to meet K four months ago.  What a blessing she has been for us.  She is a beautiful young woman and we love her so very much.  We are in awe of God's intricate work in this entire situation! 
We ask for your continued prayers for Caleb's entire birth family.  I can't begin to imagine the grief that they are feeling today and will continue to feel for many days in the future. 
Can't wait to show him off.  God is good and hears our prayers....thanks so much for the endless prayers so many of you have been praying!!
S&Z

HOME!!

We arrived home today with baby at about 4:15 this afternoon.  He was welcomed home by his grandparents who were all here to meet him!  Now that everyone has left, he's eaten, changed and sleeping....YESSSSSS!!
Today was an emotional day.  Of course we are thrilled with bringing our son home, but it was definitely hard to see K grieve.  I just can't imagine what she's feeling....she is an awesome woman and we are so excited for the open adoption plan we have decided on.  I really think it's going to be amazing for us and for baby.
We're hoping for a little sleep tonight, but realize that may be wishful thinking.  K is confident in her plan and set to surrender tomorrow at 2:15.  We are very hopeful, but continue to remind ourselves that things can change in an instant.  I promise to post all the details about our little guy tomorrow afternoon or evening once we know he's ours to share.
Love to all!! 
With smiling hearts,
S&Z

Birthday Boy!

Today I got a call about 10 this morning from K's grandma that she was at the hospital in labor.  She was 5 cm dilated, so I finished up at work and headed home.  Zach and I packed the car and were on the road within an hour.  We arrived at the hospital and within 2 hours he arrived....a healthy 8 lb 7 oz baby boy!!  He is adorable and we are head over heels in love with him!  We got to spend about 5 or 6 hours with him today and have had an awesome experience with K and her family thus far.  More details to come towards the end of the week.
We are so grateful for your prayers during this stressful time.
S&Z

Anticipation....

As the due date draws nearer I find my self becoming more anxious.  I now not only freak out every time I get a call or a text, but I also wake up in the middle of the night and check my phone, just to ensure I didn't sleep thru our call from K.  It's actually getting quite ridiculous.  I've been trying to keep myself busy, and have taken up sewing and completed a baby quilt...actually I'm started on my second, just to keep my mind occupied.  But as much as I've enjoyed sewing it only distracts me for so long.  So here I am blogging to take up a few minutes of my time, and fill you all in on....well nothing actually ;)
I'm so excited to meet this little guy, to bring him home and welcome him into our family.  We appreciate your thoughts and prayers now more than ever, as the first few days will be the most nerve wracking for both of us.
Blessings,
S&Z 

It's a new year!

As the ball dropped on New Years Eve, I don't think I was ever so happy to see a year come to an end.  And it's not that I'd change what we've been through, because as crazy as it sounds I wouldn't, but I am definitely ready for brighter, baby-filled days.  What Zach and I experienced in 2010 has made us stronger in faith and in love.  I'm not sure why we went through all the heartache, but I know that our story, our testimony will provide encouragement to adoptive couples down the road.  I feel confident in saying that, because I have turned to two women who have experienced failed adoptions and their encouraging words have helped us get through those rough days.  I know that if they can do it with the help of God, we can too!  A lot of people have said to me, "it's just terrible that you had to experience such heart ache" or "I just can't see why you would have to go through something like this" and all I can say to those rhetorical questions is we may never know why, and really who are we to question God...He's a big guy and I'm pretty sure He knows what He's doing!
Anyhow onto those brighter days....3 weeks from tomorrow is K's due date.  We continue to have contact with her and are optimistic about bringing our son home this month.  We plan to see her one more time before the baby comes to celebrate her birthday with her family on Sunday.  We are definitely excited, but nervous about those first 72 hours.  I just have to keep reminding myself not to allow my emotions from our previous situation overtake this one.  These two women are very different and they developed adoption plans for different reasons.
We are ready to go to the hospital when we get "the call" from K and I'm pretty sure I think I'm getting "the call" at least 5 times a day at work.  As the due date grows nearer I'm thinking that number will increase.  I've been trying to put my nervous energy to work at home being productive around the house and preparing for the chaos a baby will bring into our lives....a chaos that we will accept with open, grateful, loving, and longing arms!
Blessings to all of you for this new year!
S&Z