Second Chance

Last Thursday we got a very unexpected phone call from the director of our agency saying that S called and wanted to place her daughter with Zach and I.  After many hours of phone calls and prayerful consideration we decided that we would say yes.  We felt like there is an emotional attachment to this little girl and a hole in our hearts since she was taken away from us.  We decided to say yes with the stipulation that we weren't willing to jeopardize our current plan with K.  We were told we could adopt both babies, we just needed to see how K felt about all of this. 
S scheduled to surrender her rights today at noon and we were expecting the baby to arrive home around 1.  We went through the weekend telling ourselves we would believe it when we saw it, we weren't too hopeful given her history, but we were excited at the possibility of having babies that would be 4 months apart.  Well I'll skip through all the confusing details that have transpired between now and then.  Bottom line is that S didn't sign today, she wasn't even at the designated location at noon and she wouldn't answer her phone.  Zach and I decided that we didn't want to be contacted by the agency if she called again.  Our hearts break for this little girl, but we have to protect ourselves at this point.  We don't want to do anything to destroy what we have going with K and quite honestly we don't feel like we can go through this again.  It's emotionally exhausting!! 
On a positive note, things continue to go well with K and her pregnancy.  On Wednesday she will be 31 weeks.  She asked Zach and I to come to her ultrasound in mid December, so we are just going to keep our eyes on January.  It leaves our hearts feeling a lot less stressed and maybe even smiling!!