A year ago...

It's hard to believe how much our lives have changed over the past year.  God has blessed us immensely with Caleb and his birthmom, and we are so grateful for that, but as September draws nearer I can't help but remember that baby girl that was almost ours.  I think about her and S every single day.  I pray that they are safe and that S has somehow turned her life around.  I find myself wanting to text her to appease my worries, but on the other hand I'm not sure I want to open that can of worms again.  She put us through more stress and heartache than I ever thought possible, but I honestly do believe that I have forgiven her wholeheartedly.  Please pray for S and her children, as I've said before she needs to know the love of Jesus!  Zach and I appreciate your prayers as well as Sept. 9 grows closer, we know we'll need them!  I have a feeling that's going to be a difficult day.
Much Love,

S&Z (&C)

6 Months Old!

Last Sunday, Caleb was 6 months old!  I know it's so hard to believe.  We got his pictures taken on Sunday and I thought I'd share a few.  He was so good, just so happy and smiley the entire time.

We have a little under 2 months until our finalization hearing.   We are definitely excited about that.  Other than that, everything is going well.  We don't hear too much from K, but I keep in contact with her grandma on a regular basis thru email.  This is what we have been told to expect from birthmoms, but we are honestly extremely surprised how quickly it's seemed to happen with our adoption.  We'll see what the future holds, only time will tell.
Much Love,
S&Z(&C)

Summertime!

After almost 2 months I thought it was about time for an update.  Everything with our adoption is heading in the right direction.  We continue to have our monthly post placement visits with our social worker which will continue until finalization which is scheduled for Sept. 21. 
Caleb continues to be an AWESOME blessing!  We are constantly in awe of him.  He's growing so quickly just like everyone says.  He's sitting, rolling, and is eating anything and everything we give him.  It's looking like we are going to have a crawler before long!  Last time at the pediatrician he weighed just over 18 lbs. and was 26 1/2 inches long...he's finally getting taller!  He is the happiest baby and just so easy going.  We know we probably won't be so lucky with our next child! 
For now we are enjoying our summer, looking forward to our camping trip as well as our long weekend at Crooked Lake. 
Much Love....S&Z(&C)

What's New??

^{Well it's been a couple of weeks and there have been a few events in our lives since I last wrote.  First of all, we had Caleb baptized on Mother's Day.  It was a wonderful day filled with family.  K came with her grandma and brother, and I got to share my very first Mother's Day with the woman who made it possible for me to be a mommy.  And despite of everyone else's worries, it was amazing!!}  

^{I also got Caleb's 3 month pictures on Tuesday and since Cargle Photography gives me the copyright to them, I'm going to share a few of them with you!!}

^{I will leave you with this verse....I came across it this morning in my transformation journal.  It helped me many times during our journey and it can come in handy when you are just having a bad day.  It reminds me that regardless of how hard it is to go through our suffering it doesn't compare to the suffering Jesus endured for our sin and that God has a reason for it and in the end it will make you more like Christ!!} 

^{Romans 5:1-5}

^{Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.  And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.  Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.}

^{Much Love,}

^S&Z

Strong Enough

I heard a new song on K-LOVE today and it really struck a chord with me.  I just had to come home and download it.  "Strong Enough" is the name of the song by Matthew West.  I encourage you to check it out.  It brings to mind all of the people who have said to Zach and I that they don't think they could go thru what we've been thru on our adoption journey.  To those people we generally say we didn't think we could either, but by the grace of God we did.  If you are feeling called to adoption, but are fearful because of the risks involved, please realize that you will not face this alone.  God will be with you every step of the way.  The cheesy little saying that reoccurs in my head is "If God brings you to it, He'll bring you thru it" and that is so very true.  Zach and I have emerged from this journey as a family of three, who know God more intimately than when we did before.
This is going to be a crazy week for us, hopefully our little trooper will stand strong and remain happy.  Tomorrow we have my Grandpa's viewing and funeral which is always emotionally exhausting.  Sunday Caleb gets baptized and we are having a party afterwards.  Parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, as well as K and her grandma all plan to attend.  We are looking forward to having our little guy baptized.  I just pray that the stress doesn't get the best of me.  I have a tendency to try to make everything just perfect...it never works, but for some reason I don't remember that when it's happening.
No pictures with this post, but I hope to have Caleb's 3 month pictures soon!

Blessings!!
S&Z

On my heart.....

A few weeks ago we went to speak at an adoptive parenting class Zach and I took last spring.  It's a wonderful class and we were so excited to share our story.   Time totally got away from us, and we didn't get to share everything that we wanted, but it was an awesome experience and I was so excited to see so many couples excited about adoption.  It truly has been an amazing experience for us.  Don't get me wrong, it was by no means easy, but our faith has been tested and grown tremendously over the past year and a half.  When we spoke a member of the class asked us if we would do this all again, knowing what we know now.  Zach and I both said yes.  We knew there were risks, we felt as prepared as possible when we decided to adopt, and we feel like our agency did their very best to make our first adoption plan a success.  In the end it didn't work out and that is no one's fault.  I don't blame the agency and I don't even blame S. 
I think our story may have scared some people and that wasn't at all our intention.  We just wanted people to know the risks and God forbid if what happened to us happens to them, they can think back to us our story, draw strength, and know that they too will survive. I've said it before and I'll say it again....God's timing is perfect.   If He has laid adoption on your heart, He will not let you down. 

We continue to enjoy parenthood.  Caleb is starting to laugh and it is absolutely adorable.  He just melts my heart.  We are so very grateful for K and her decision, she has changed our lives forever!!

Until next time.....
Much love!
S&Z

Good News!

We got big news yesterday that takes some weight and anxiety off our shoulders with the legalities of our adoption.  There were no birthfathers registered on the Ohio Putative Father Registry in regards to our adoption!  And come Monday look forward to feeling even more confident with how things are going.  We go to court on the 21st for an interlocutory hearing, basically an extra step recommended by our attorney for added security.  Looks like Caleb is going to be stuck with us ;)

This past weekend we met with K, her grandma, and her brother.  It was the first time we had seen her since that bittersweet day when we left the hospital.  She was so surprised to see how much Caleb has grown.  She was a little emotional, but I think overall it was a happy day for everyone involved.  Zach and I are very comfortable with our adoption plan in this situation.  The relationship we have developed with K over the past 6 months is just so natural and normal.  God really knew what He was doing when He brought us together!

Zach and I have both returned to work this week, which means Caleb has spent 3 days at the babysitter's.  So far it's been ok, no major issues and he seems to be adjusting well.  I think it's more of an adjustment for mommy and daddy as we have so much to get done when we get home from work.  I'm sure it will just take some time to develop a routine. 

Our other exciting news, or should I say my other exciting news is that we have been invited to tell our story to a class of potential adoptive parents at a local hospital.  We took the class last spring and loved it so much.  During our failed adoption we clung to the words that those adoptive couples spoke.  It gave us hope that God would provide, and to pick ourselves up and jump back in that rollercoaster car.  I look forward to meeting families who are just beginning their journey and hopefully our story will help them at some point along this sometimes long and windy road.  

Here's a couple of recent pics....

That's about all for now....
Much Love,
S&Z